Not letting fear hold me back anymore!

Thursday, July 11, 2013

Does anyone else have a problem with going places on their own?  I can’t stand it! It makes me feel so self-conscious, like everyone is judging me and thinking “Oh look at that loser with no friends eating lunch by herself”.  I know I always wonder when I see people out in public places alone.  Odds are however that this is all in my head.  So I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately and decided that it’s high-time I get over this fear.  I mean, I do live by myself in a new state and all.  I don’t think I can constantly call one of my 4 friends that I’ve made so far every time I want to go to a movie or grab food out somewhere (actually I tried, turns out they have their own lives… weird).  I’m always going to try to get someone to go with me before I resort to being alone but it would be nice to have less anxiety about something as small as going to the art museum this weekend.  There are so many things that I want to do and I’m tired of using “I don’t have anyone to go with” as an excuse!

I started small last weekend by going to Starbies on my own and reading for a few hours.  I didn’t die.  And the only reason anyone gave me any weird looks was because I was wearing a baseball hat inside and kept peeking from behind my books to scan the room for someone staring at me with judgmental eyes.  I’m positive I made myself look like a creeper.  Next step, art museum.

All of this is leading up to the concerts I want to go to and trips I want to go on!  All of my normal partners in crime are back in Texas (and getting married and/or having babies) so I’m trekking forward on my own.  I’ve already missed one of my favorite bands at a small venue here in Birmingham because I was too chicken to go alone! Still kicking myself, ugh.  I’ve REALLY been wanting to go to this concert series in Atlanta this fall called Music Midtown but was putting off buying a ticket because I wanted to wait to find someone to go with.  (It’s basically like SXSW in ATX or FPSF in Houston)  Well, forget that!  I’m not missing 22 AMAZING bands including Journey just because I’m a pansy.  I bought my ticket today!!!!!!  It’s already printed and hung up on my fridge and I. Am. Pumped.  I’m also planning a weekend trip to NYC this fall so hopefully I’m completely over my fear by then or else that’s gonna be A LOT of unwanted “me time”.

It doesn’t matter what your fears may be- if they are holding you back from the life you want to live, then give them up!  We’ll work through it together :)  I’m a big advocate of the Baby Step Method so maybe try something small today, I bet nothing bad happens.

Repeat it with me: "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind." 2 Timothy 1:7


1 comment:

  1. Loved this post Beth! Good for you for buying that ticket! With deployment nearing, I am working on becoming more independent as well. It helps to know I'm not the only one who is weary of going places alone!