Alright, alright, alright!

Tuesday, June 7, 2016

Welcome to You Found Beth 2.0!  I’m not going to take down any of the old stuff I posted but I will say that going forward though this blog is going to (obvi) be waaaaay more about wellness, nutrition, weight loss and living a healthy life.  With that- here’s my fitstory!

As with many, I can only really remember being heavy.  I look at pictures of me from before puberty and I see that I was “average” size but I just don’t really remember it- probably because trauma is what we remember the most.  After puberty, I just started gaining weight and never stopped.  When I started gaining weight I was really active- loved playing outdoors and was always on soccer teams and taking dance classes.  Once the weight gain became noticeable enough that my poor 13ish year old self felt self-conscious and increasingly tired I just quit.  I quit everything and became a TV addict.  I was always watching TV and movies- I even remember one summer my Mom pleading with me to go outside and start up soccer again or something because she’d leave for work in the morning and come home at night with my enlarging bum would still in the same spot on the couch.  But I didn’t want to, so that was that.  I won’t linger on the “tramatic years” of middle school and junior high school but just know that they were awful and completely hidden from all of my friends.   Overweight people, especially kids, internalize so much and it just makes them crawl deeper into their own heads.  By high school I was handling my overweightedness better.  I had accepted I was fat and became the fat, funny friend.  Be honest, we all have at least one.  I was social and had the.most.amazing. group of friends ever (many of whom are still on the bestie tier) so life was better but I was still secretly unhappy.  I have no idea how heavy I was, all I know is that this was probably when I was at my heaviest… or tied for the top spot.  Four years of yo-yo dieting and binge eating but still never losing weight is how I’d sum up my health in high school.

But, I survived and then in college my self-consciousness drove me to start thinking about weight loss as something I should consider.  I joined the best sorority in the world (Be a DG) and all of those girls were so beautiful and thinner than me and happy!  Boys wanted to date them instead of be their best friend and they all just seemed to be who I wanted to be.  I would try to eat better, at least when I was with them (sometimes) but then when I was alone binge eating was life.  I didn’t make a lot of actual effort until Sophomore year when I was so stupidly smitten with some silly boy that I became obsessed with losing weight.  I made healthier food choices for the most part but the main way I dropped down to the lowest weight I could remember at the time was from over-working out.  Yes, it’s a thing.  I was addicted to working out!  I went to the Rec Center on campus 3-4 times a day for at least two hours each time.  I missed classes to work out!  My whole life revolved around exercise because when I lost weight this boy would finally want to date me.  What a dope.  If only I could go back in time and smack myself!!  Anyways a few months after my brother’s wedding my Junior year, school got really hectic and I finally had to put my grades first and all of the weight came rushing back… plus a lot.  By graduation I was so heavy and still had no clue what I weighed.  I really never got on a scale, at least not that I can remember but given my clothing size I’d say I was over 250lbs.  Fast forward through each year from then until last May and you’ll see constant yo-yo dieting, mistreatment of my body and an enormous amount on self-hate.  I didn’t go out much, didn’t want to be around friends (lost more than 1 for being “flaky” but really I was just too ashamed to go out but couldn’t tell anyone that!).  Nothing was going right!  I was fatter than ever and so unhappy.  In 2014, I started working at what I thought was my dream job where one of my besties was working.  Surely I’d be happy now!  I threw myself into work and nothing else mattered (sound familiar- like the exercise addict from college?).

Finally, I broke.  Memorial Day Weekend 2016 in Houston when we had record amounts of rainfall and intense flooding I found myself trapped in a monsoon (seriously, the rain over me was the scary pink color on the radar!) in my car on a stretch of highway in the middle-of-nowhere-Texas with no street lights.  I had my first every panic attack and boy was it a doozy.  The next day I went to the doctor because I was having panic attacks about everything now! 4-5 times a day, panic attacks!  She prescribed me some anxiety meds and told me I had to come back in two days.  Two days later she told me I needed to lose weight.  Instead of just telling me to lose weight like so many doctors before had done, she gave me one homework assignment.  Cut your portion size in half at one meal a day.  That’s it.  Keep eating whatever I want, whatever I normally would, just eat only half as much one time a day then come back to her four days later for my next check-up.  She didn’t tell me how much I weighed and I didn’t ask.  I did exactly what she said and at my next visit she told me I was down on the scale!!  She didn’t tell me what my initial weight was but did tell me what my weight was that day and I was officially morbidly obese.  I was having some heart problems as well so she referred me to a cardiologist.  He’s the one that really scared me into keeping the downward trend on the scale going.  Basically I naturally have a slow pulse and the extra weight I carried was literally making my heart not function correctly- it just couldn’t keep up.  He told me some more tips (which I’ll share in later posts) and said I had to come back in 4 weeks and that he wanted me to have lost 15 lbs.  Give me a goal and my type A personality kicks in!  One month later I went back to his office down 16 lbs.  From there I went to see him each month where I had a stress test done to see how my heart was doing and left with a new weight goal to hit for the next appointment.

That’s basically how it all started!  I also started going to a Christian therapist sometime at the end of the summer because the anxiety just wasn’t becoming manageable and together we decided my job wasn’t healthy for me so I quit that and moved to Argentina where I could live with my parents and solely focus on getting healthy.  When my savings were kapoot I relocated to here to Austin and that’s my life May 2015 to May 2016 in a nutshell! I’m so ridiculously happy with life, work and really feel like I’m finally living.  15ish years of blah and now I’ve arrived!  Why didn’t I do this sooner?!

Sorry this is the longest blog post in the history of blogging but it’s just this first one.  I’m going to try to post at least once a week with recipes, exercise tips, health education, updates on my journey and life, etc.  I don’t want to be a coach or sell anyone anything- I just want to be for you the resource I wish I’d had to maybe have made this lifestyle change sooner!  Have an amazing, healthy evening and tell yourself you’ll make one small healthy change tomorrow!


Song of the Day

Friday, April 11, 2014

Just another reason to go to Iceland, apparently I love the musicians they breed. Like 4 of my favorite bands are from there.


There's no place like home

Thursday, April 10, 2014

Exactly 7 days from today will be my last day of work at my current job, 8 days from today I’ll pack up my life and 9 days from today I will be back living in Texas!
That's right, I'm coming home!

It’s been right at a year since I left home for Alabama.  I had absolutely no intention of ever moving back to Texas, definitely never back to The Woodlands where I grew up, but God had other plans.  Of course I was very vocal with my “Never moving back to Texas” speeches so now I’m having to eat crow… that’s just one of the lessons I’ve learned from my year down South.  It’s been a great adventure and I absolutely love the beautiful Alabama outdoors.  Hiking Oak Mountain with my pup, kayaking on the weekends and watching fire flies at Caldwell Park are just a few of the wonderful memories I’ll be bringing back with me.

The number one thing that I will miss the most about Alabama are the beautiful, amazing, kind, smart, funny and genuine ladies of Delta Gamma at the University of Montevallo.  Advising them during recruitment and continuing our friendships since have been the main sources of my happiness in the past year.  To any of you Zeta Nus who may be reading this- I love each one of you and am so blessed that you came into my life.  I expect you all to keep being okay with having an old grandma as a friend and keep me up-to-date on the new lingo (i.e. ratchet).  If you’re ever in Texas and I find out you didn’t contact me I will punish you by calling/snapchatting you daily and shouting door songs at you.

So, I’ll tell you why I’ve decided to move home.  Apart from my job turning out to not be what I was expecting it to be and my ghetto apartment situation, I miss my people.  Like, I knew that I would miss everyone (we’ve actually done an exceptional job of keeping in touch) but this is an ache that only feels better when I’m home visiting.  I’ve made some new friends here in Birmingham but none of them come close to what I left behind.  No one makes my sides hurt from laughing like Emily.  No one is as easy to talk to as Jenny.  No one gives better hugs than Alyssa.  No one loves all the same things as I do like Patton.  No one is as honest with me as Chelsea.  No one knows me better than Alli.  And no one listens like Mommy.  These are tried and true facts that aren’t going to change no matter how many new people I meet.  Why didn’t anyone slap me upside the head and explain this to me before I moved?!  Oh, and don’t even get me started on my niece!!  My brother and sister-in-law had to go and have the. most. adorable baby girl on the planet and since I’m 800 miles away, I miss everything!  When she's older and I need to guilt her into hanging out with me I'm going to use this excuse.  "I dropped everything and moved back to Texas for you! Now grab that N'SYNC cd, get in the car and let's go mall walking!"

I don’t exactly have a job lined up yet.  Until that happens my plan is to just to decompress, workout like a boss, and figure out what my next step should be.  I’ve been battling with the idea of going back to school to get my MBA for a few years now and with my parents moving to Argentina again this fall, it kind of feels like I should start that ball rolling again.  Who knows though… I’m so indecisive that a slight breeze could stop that ball from rolling next week. 

Anyways that’s my big announcement!  I gave it a year but Alabama just isn’t for me.  I’m ready to come home to Texas where the people are friendlier, Mexican food is king and I won’t have to hear “Roll Tide Roll” but on a few rare occasions.


Song of the Day

Wednesday, April 2, 2014

I haven't pre-ordered an album in a really long time but I did just that last night for Sam Smith's new album.  He performed on SNL beautifully this past weekend so be sure to watch those videos too.


Swing and a miss

Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Confession:  I hate baseball.  I was going to talk about this yesterday but seeing as it was Opening Day, I decided I’d be kind and not crap on the sport on it’s holiday. 

Seriously though, baseball?! Ugh.  I've recently realized that there are 4 types of baseball fans (during a season):
  1. Diehard fans who annoy the crap out of you with too many statistics and speak a foreign language consisting primarily of abbreviations, acronyms and last names
  2. Good-time fans who claim to like baseball but really don’t care about the game- they just like an excuse to sit, drink beer and eat hot dogs with friends
  3. Casual fans who watch baseball as a filler until other (cough cough, better) sports start again in the fall
  4. Non-fans who are honest with the world and admit that they have zero interest in baseball
I’m sure I’ve already upset a bunch of people but if you simmer down and really think about it… I believe you’ll find that I’m telling the truth.
There's actually a big baseball presence in Birmingham because, frankly, that’s all there is to do here once college football is over.  We have a feeder team for the White Sox here who are apparently pretty good so every weekend during the summer is all about baseball.  With Opening Day coming up, I decided to ask some of my neighbors and coworkers questions about baseball to test my “4 types of baseball fans” theory.  Most of them are #2, Good-time fans who just like to go to the stadium and sit around drinking beer from a 54 oz. plastic cup.  A few of the guys were #3, Casual fans, who are even trying their luck at a baseball fantasy league this season but they weren’t too excited about it.  I could tell they weren’t too excited because while we were talking about baseball they got sidetracked with asking me about Aggie Football which then segued into a discussion about how much I love Aggie Basketball which then led to a discussion about March Madness and the Final 4.  Then we left and completely forgot the conversation started with baseball.  That's all I need to prove my theory so now I'll explain my top 2 reasons for thinking baseball is THE WORST.

1. Each team plays about 162 games in a season… 162 games?!!  Are you kidding me?  How can I care about each game when I know there are literally hundreds more to go until teams start getting knocked out of the competition?!  Last season I tried to just hop in halfway through but I got bored after 2 games and gave up.  I know I have friends who complain to me about basketball seasons being too long but I checked… basketball season is about 80 games, then the playoff games add to that.  So the final 2 teams would play about 110 games, a lot less than 162.

2. In addition to how many games there are, baseball games are waaaaaaay too long!  Depending on where in the season the game is, 9 innings takes an average of 2 hours and 52 minutes.  Oh. My. Gosh.  And I know football games can be just as long now thanks to commercial time outs and replays and injuries but it’s the pace that makes football games move so much faster than baseball games. Plus they do stuff during the breaks to keep us entertained.  Maybe baseball teams should get cheerleaders or dance teams?

I could go on about the dipping, weight issues, off- field injuries, the ridiculous rules that are way to complex and change between American and National leagues, the fact that players can’t be freely substituted, designated and pinch hitters, and more as further explanation but I think reasons 1 and 2 above speak for themselves.  Good Lord baseball is boring.  An old roommate of mine once dated a guy who played in the minors and even he admitted that he could barely sit through a game he wasn’t playing in!

Phew. I’m glad that’s out there.  I know my feelings are not going to be popular with some of you but that’s okay… I’m sure you could take down my favorite sports just as easily.  There could be some pretty simple changes to baseball that would make me like it but that’s not going to happen so I’ll just have to ignore ESPN for a few months as I always do during the summer.